I can handle a few glitches in a game, but while I do like Two Worlds, it is becoming a lesson in how high I can make my stress level… seriously. Here are a few things that have happened.

• Jumped behind the structure where the fire element was… then discovered there was no way out, so I had to return to a previous save.

• Got stuck on two staircases on two different occassions… Yep, had to return to a previous save, and none of them were too recent.
• Screen froze multiple times after teleporting… you guessed it, previous save time
• My horse and I got stuck under a tree branch, took forever for some wildlife to discover us and attack.
• And now, after slaying about 30 Orcs in ::spoiler alert:: Ashos, I am now stuck on a door frame inside a three-room house. Unfortunately, the floor is littered with orcs but none alive to kill me.

And yes, there are potions that are poisons, BUT they don’t allow you to drink them unless you have a higher HP than what it will poison you with. And I have no teleporting stones with me (although that wouldn’t have helped me with the fire element since I would have permanentl lost it them).

ARGGHHHH…. And did I mention one of the achievements is glitched, so that nice 1000 gamer points is actually only 930, with still no game update to fix it.

So what I really really want is some way I can commit suicide so I can teleport to the nearest healing site and get my game going on without having to go back to the previous save.

Added: So here is how I unstuck myself from the edge of the door frame. I summoned an Octogron who went off to kill nearby Orcs and opened the front door of the house as he did so. I took advantage of the opened door to fire a fireball at an Orc I could see, who then came in to attack me… unfortunately, he was doing it pretty slowly while he shot me with an arrow, but it worked in the end with my death and respawn out near the former Zombie infested house.

Do I recommend the game? If you are an RPG (Role Playing Game) fan and remember to save often, definitely. If you are wanting to try an RPG for the first time, go for Oblivion (Elder Scrolls) instead… much better, one of my favorite games, and the only one I have my perfect 1250/1250 achievement points in!

Discovery Channel’s show FutureWeapons is doing a special episode tonight which features the weapons of Halo 3. It airs at 8pm EST on Discovery Channel.

Worth checking out for all the fangirls who want a different kind of sneak peak into Halo 3, the show done with XBox 360 & Halo 3, so it will be as official as it gets. And since Discovery Channel also offered those free maps for Gears of War, you gotta wonder what they have cooked up for Halo 3 too.

Oh, yeah, and I’ve got a sneak peak for ya 😉

You gotta love these cool XBox themed panties, with the “Achievement Locked” across the front of them. You can get your own pair at Split Reason for $12.95

I was in an attack and defend match in Calypso Casino tonight. I was playing defense, but I only knew one other person on the defense team. The assault team was a fairly weak team, so it should have been a piece of cake, right? Wrong! Because in this scenario, the only players on the entire defense team who were speaking were… you guessed it… me and my friend.

Now winning on defense is easy with a good team… and even with a bad team so long as everyone is talking so people can jump in and cover where others have died. And especially crucial are those little tidbits like “Watch your back, elevators” or “there’s a guy in the sniper spot” or “skylights”. These all help you get on top of the enemy. But for the entire first five minutes of the game, nobody spoke except me and my friend, and this was despite the two of us giving specific warnings to team members by name, to which they physically reacted to so we knew they were listening. And even asking positions on other players or “XYZ, where did you just die” elicted zero response.

It wasn’t until we were about eight minutes into the match… by which point assault had the package since whoever was covering escalator or the front of the vault never bothered to alert anyone when they died… that we finally heard the first word spoken by someone else. And what was it? Yep, “Fxxk”.

But just a heads up to the Fxxk guy, chances are pretty good if you had spoken up long before that, you probably wouldn’t have needed to say that word in the first place. So plugin those mics, and then be sure you use them.

Having been a chick gamer for a long time, I think I have heard it all… especially out of mouths of twelve year old pre-puberty little boys. But there are also those geeky twenty-somethings who have been hiding in their parents basement gaming all day, and you’d swear they had never talked to another female in their lives. And I have been asked on occassion what guy games should do to get the attention of a girl gamer they have played with and wouldn’t mind getting to know better.

But first, I think it is important that you learn what you shouldn’t say to a girl gamer, before you even think about what you should.

1. Don’t ask me to suck your teeny weenie.
Yes, and I am sure it is a teeny weenie, no matter how much you try and convince me otherwise. And no, I am not interested. Period.

2. Don’t teabag me.
Yeah, that is one of those things that the twelve year old pre-pubescents like to do. Rifle my body with your shotgun if you must, but don’t teabag me.

3. Don’t ask me to teabag someone, no matter how wickedly I just nailed the poor sucker.
No matter how you slice and dice it, a girl teabagging just doesn’t have quite the same effect.

4. Don’t ask me my age.
Never, ever ask a woman her age. If you are worried about the whole under-eighteen thing, then maybe ask if she is legal. But don’t expect her to tell you her age. Sometimes it is better thinking she is a nineteen year old hottie than a forty-five year old grandma. And for the record, I am far closer to a nineteen year old than a forty-five year old 😉

5. Don’t ask me my boob size.
Enuff said. And same goes for weight and overall hotness rating.

6. Don’t follow me along like a puppy dog
Yes, I am hot. But you don’t need to follow me all over the map ogling my character’s girliness.

7. Don’t pretend to be getting it on with me
Don’t come along and rub your body up against mine, especially when I am working it. I can’t count the number of times some random guy I have never played with will see me in my custom pink camo holding my position in Calypso Casino and come along right next to me and do the whole “crouch and stand up repeatedly” thing, and think they are cool. If you do it, you are anything but cool.

8. Unworthy friend requests
Send random friend requests just because I’m a girl, and it is usually sent following the guy doing at least one of the above. I don’t have time to waste on immature little boys, nor room on my friends list.

9. Have some idiot gamertag like MILFHNTR or BALLINherHARD.
Once again, enuff said.

10. Being a sexist idiot.
Ok, I realize it can be a shock that there is a real live girl in your game. So I will let you get away with one or two duh moment questions like “Are you a girl?” and “So is it like your boyfriend’s account and he actually lets you play?”. Men tend to be stunned I am a chick playing and am a non-glitched Elite. But if you think I’m going to listen to your ten minute rant about why girls shouldn’t be allowed to play anything other than Viva Pinata and PacMan? You’ll find yourself booted PDQ.

Now, if you don’t have a dream of finding a hot gamer chick as your next girlfriend/wife – then you probably don’t have anything to worry about when you come across an elusive girl gamer on XBox. But if you do, or you just think it is cool to play with a girl, try and restrain yourself from doing any of the above… or at least until I know you well enough that when you tea bag me I can call you a dirty name in return and all in fun. Cause don’t forget, you just might find yourself on the team with me and a bunch of my friends, and let’s just say most of them don’t take kindly to anyone trash talking “their girl.”

So I buy a lot of video games…  and here are some of the responses I have received from male employees at the stores….

Buying Rainbow Six Vegas the day it came out… “You do realize whoever you are buying this for has to be at least eighteen?”  Well, usually a girl takes this as a compliment, but not when the insinuation was that the game wasn’t for me.

Buying Shadowrun…. “You know you have to be hooked up to the internet to play this?”  Gee, what’s this thing called the internet I keep hearing about?

And random game shopping…

Employee: “Can I interest you in reserving Halo 3?”
Bad Gamer Girl: “No thank you.”  If I was interested in spending an extra $5 at your store just to reserve my copy of the game, which you are notorious for shorting people on anyway, I would have.
Employee: “Well, how about Crackdown, they have the Halo beta going on right now.”
Bad Gamer Girl: “Nope.”  Yeah, I’ve already been playing the Halo 3 beta.
Employee: “There’s a new Tom Clancy, Ghost Recon out.”
Bad Gamer Girl: I do my best to give him my I’m tired of you trying to upsell me look, besides the game has been out for months already, hardly new, and yep, I bought it the day it came out.
Employee: “So just this book then?”
Bad Gamer Girl: “Yes, please.”  But as I am paying, I notice a new Tetris game for the 360.  Now, a friend of mine loves Tetris, so I think this will be great for when she comes over, since she tends to go for the PacMan or Frogger type games.  I used to be a old school GameBoy tetris fiend, so I figure I can game and school her at the same time :)  “Actually, I’ll get that new Tetris game too.”
Employee: Rolling his eyes at me “Yeah, I try to offer you the good stuff, I should’ve figured you’d want something like Tetris.”

And there was the time I was buying the XBox magazine for the Rainbow Vegas demo.  And I got the quizzical “and who are you buying this magazine for?” from the guy ringing it up.  Maybe he was wishing he was my boyfriend, if that was who I was buying it for.

Now, I am not conceited or anything, but I am sure I could kick his butt in any FPS game, but I didn’t feel like he was worthy enough to actually divulge my gamer tag to.  And I am certain I have spent more $ in gaming in 2007 alone than he has in his entire life, even including what he bought with his allowance.

And video game companies wonder why more women aren’t buying their games… they do a fairly decent job at it, but then when it hits the stores, it all falls apart.  After all, women tend to be the ones doing more of the buying… and they don’t have to cater to women, but come on, try acting just a tad bit more accepting that it could be the chick who wants to shoot terrorists, not her hubby or boyfriend.

And I should add that I only go to the chain of stores where those incidents have all happened if I have no other choice… I actually pay more to buy my games elsewhere.

Frag Doll Valkyrie has a great post over on the Frag Doll blog about how to tell if that person you are playing with is a real live girl, or just one of those pre-voice-cracked little, um, boys, you come across.  First hint, they are waaaay more annoying than just about any chick you will find playing any FPS game.

 The number one rule that will allow you to hit the jackpot of usually MANY girl gamers is that they tend to travel in packs. Yes, there are those females that get jealous of other girls and want to be the only girl in the guild or in matchmaking rooms, but these are far and few between. Many females find a sanctity and bond in relating to other girl gamers, so if you find one, chances are she has at least ten more females on her friends with who she runs around questing or beating down the bad guys. In other words, befriend ONE girl gamer (the right way) and you almost certainly will meet a few more very, very quickly.

Read the full blog post here.

Some interesting perspective, although I do wish I could find more girl gamers on Rainbow, I can count on one hand all of the chick Rainbow players I have come across in matches on one hand… unless some of them just aren’t talking during matches.

Are you a girl?  Yep, this is probably the question I get asked most when I game… it either comes as I am talking in-game (and racking up the kills) or when someone sees my pink and purple camo as I run around Calypso Casino in Rainbow Vegas.  Yep, I am a girl.  And this is my Bad Girl Gamers blog so all you guys out there I school can find out that there actually are some kick ass gamer girls out there that know how to play… and know how to handle their frags.